The Language Of Love And Respect: Cracking the Communication Code with Your MateThe Language Of Love And Respect A Revolutionary Solution to the #1 Marriage Problem Why does communication between couples remain the number one marriage issue Because, says Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, most spouses dont know that they speak two different languages. They are sending each other messages in code, but they wont crack that code until they see that she listens to hear the language of love and he listens to hear the language of respect. Dr.